A toy, a stuffed cuddly animal, a child, like a doll, soft all over, something at night to hold in one's arms and hands, to cradle it, a soft comfy cloth material, white and pink, little decorative spots, red valentine hearts as eyes, a thread in the torso that is snipped, she is your child but with a separateness, being from you and for you, so very together are you both! A baby girl or baby boy, to always have him as a child. A curly thread sewed as a mouth that grins sheepishly at you as you continue to hold her, to love her.
To give her a name, a name that like a streak of lightening came to you, the only name she could possibly have. Her name is "Anna". To have an Aunt Anna who crocheted me a blanket, white and blue, a soft Linus's blanket to carry with me everywhere, to now have Anna as a doll.
Where to keep Anna so she will not be stolen?! To keep her under lock and key on the top shelf of a closet, a closet that is locked with a key you keep on yourself hanging from your neck never to be lost.
How can Anna be your "Savior"? She is there always for you and never moves, she stays in one place, she does not get up and walk away. The hearts embroidered into her white eyes, are red hearts, like red candies, she looks at you always with love in her eyes and never takes away her glare.
Not to worry if Anna maybe hungry, she is never hungry and never thirsty, she will remind you to hydrate yourself and to eat when you are hungry, but not in this hungered condition herself. She is safe, secure, well nurtured, she is in existence purposely, singularly, to nurture you and only you, and she does this as you touch her, you feel her softness, a body of cotton and silk cloth, her skin of felt, to feel her felt, seeking closeness. Ask her to love you back, and her never ending smile will say "Yes, I love you back".
To shake her hand that feels like a paw, the paw of a Teddy Bear. To kiss her threaded lips.
Never to lose her, she remains always and forever on your top shelf. To know she is safe and sound, and accessible to you at your will.
"Are you okay Anna? I will tuck you into bed and see you in the morning! Good night, Anna".
"Good night, Sweetheart" ;-)
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